VIRGIN RIVER... AND THE WEST'S GREAT DIVORCE

“This is terrible, but I can’t stop,” was my immediate thought when I began watching this cozy series several years ago. After losing her husband and baby, a pretty nurse moves to a small town in a thick forest that rests on a magnificent river.

She starts work at the local clinic and meets a handsome but worn-in ex-marine who runs the local bar.

He also suffers from PTSD from his years in combat.

Two broken hearts about to heal in front of us in this exquisite landscape - I’m here for it.

What did I care if the acting was one note? We all know that the woodenness of the character Preacher makes Pinocchio look like a real boy, but we don’t care.

We all want to live here in a place of simple storylines and people being very good to each other. Why? How could this series hold up for six seasons and bait the breath of millions?

Most would say, “Oh, it’s so pretty, that’s why we watch.” The majestic river does pull us in with the promise of renewal and refreshing new beginnings. The setting is certainly a big slice of the success of this particular pizza.

But I don’t think that’s just it.

That’s not what is keeping us enchanted and gooey.

In our modern somewhat alien world, we are experiencing what comedian Tim Minchin calls a “catastrophic” divide between young men and women. Women are hiding in the ideology of the Left and young men are running to the Right.

In a culture that comfortably throws around the term toxic masculinity, many, many young men are becoming what we say they are and asking Andrew Tate what they should think. Lots of young women are no longer interested in having children with predictions suggesting that by 2050 half of the female population won’t have offspring.

This gapping divide is indeed horrific but most of us see it as normal and not especially concerning.

In the West, it feels like there is a Great Divorce taking place - our sense of home and love is shattered as we passively aggressively hollar “NEXT!” in the face of the opposite sex.

Consciously or unconsciously, Virgin River attempts to bridge this epic divide between men and women without even mentioning it.

In Virgin River, men and women adore each other. Love, life, children, and marriage are sacred and front and centre.

No one is running off to make it big in the big city - the citizens are invested in each other’s lives. And these rich lives sleep, eat, and thrive in nature. This community isn’t fighting over gender, race, and politics…they are dealing with old age, disease, love, death, loss, grief, and wildfires.

Ideas of feminism and female empowerment are addressed without blaming all men or patriarchy and men are understood and shown how to express their feelings, but none of it is done with finger-wagging—we’re all in this together in Virgin River.

This seemingly silly soap hooks into ancient archetypes - the man, the woman (yes these ideas are ancient archetypes now) the hero, the heroine. Everyone is ready to sacrifice something to stand for something bigger than themselves. Our female lead Mel insists that her new romantic interest do the right thing by his ex even though she wants him all to herself. None of them call this ex “crazy” even though she be bat shit. They help her until she is at peace with her place. Jack, our main boy does right by his ex. He listens to his woman, he takes her lead. He is always patiently wanting to know what she thinks. He aches to protect and serve her.

Preacher puts himself on the line for a woman he would never get. Even bad ass’d (and sexy-ass’d 🥵) Brady does what he does to protect the woman that he loves.

Lizzy, the young teen keeps the baby. Getting rid of it is never discussed and we learn that becoming a mother at a young age DOESN’T mean death. You don’t have to travel far and wide to find meaning and personal growth.

Jack, our ex-marine is forever building symbolic stuff with his hands. The cabin, the house, and the barn that he weds his bride in. Men and women alike, we cannot get enough of this. Even if in Woke 2025 we say we don’t want this, but we do because this is in our coding. We can’t escape it because it’s so darn cozy.

Most of the leading men in this town are ex-marines and know what it means to serve and sacrifice. They take this seriously and it becomes a pillar of their character - honor and integrity mean something to these citizens. They dive into their wildfires when necessary because they have collectively been through a masculine right of passage.

But this isn’t some out-of-date fantasy - women have power and wield it. The fire chief is a woman who knows how to take a man double her size down when he deserves it. Bri, the sexy blond thing, is a lawyer who can protect her people in ways that the men can’t….and Preacher spends all of his time in the kitchen cooking up stuff to feed people’s souls.

Virgin River is a beautiful balance of the masculine and feminine and everyone is deeply in love with each other and their natural world.

Maybe I’m making a little too much of this show, but Amid The Great Divorce, for six seasons…we have peace, love, understanding, and respect.

We have a home again.